The 2009 World Series begins tonight, where regardless of who wins, we all lose. Though lots of us have sworn off the series altogether, plenty more will still be watching in earnest, hoping ever so slightly for that non-life-threatening catastrophe that might require the series' cancellation. We'll have open threads here for each game, and perhaps the combined vitriol of this community will be enough to cause both teams to lose, somehow.

In preparation, we have each distilled our thoughts on this unholy matchup that could very well signal the end times. Here are our positions and predictions.

Sam Page

Unlike most people, I'm not compelled to root for a team when my team's not involved, so I honestly don't care who wins. Living in New York now, I kind of want the Phillies to win, so the bandwagon Yankees fans will put their hats away. That being said, you won't hear me complain if the Phillies blow it. If I had to make a prediction, I'd say the Yankees, as they are the better team. It being the playoffs, though, the opposite will probably happen.

James Kannengieser

I will be rooting for (any team that’s not the Phillies). The Mets play the Phillies 18 times a year and the Phils are in direct competition for playoff spots. The Mets play the Yankees just 6 annoying times a year. The Yankees-Mets "rivalry" is about on par with the almost non-existent Giants-Jets rivalry, in my humble opinion. Have obnoxious Yankee fan friends who scream "METS SUCK!" at you every 5 minutes? Get some new friends, as Ted Berg put it the other day. I’d obviously prefer the AL team to be one besides the Yankees but what can you do. Mariano Rivera and Alex Rodriguez are 2 of my favorite players ever so I’ll be actively rooting for them. Maybe Nick Swisher too. Another benefit of a Yankee triumph is an excuse to take a day off from work to avoid the Yankee fans heading to the ticker tape parade on my daily commute. In closing I’ll reiterate – the Phillies have Shane Victorino.

Prediction: Yankees in 6.

Alex Nelson

I'll be rooting for the Phillies. The reasons are two-fold. First, I'm a National League fan. I've only rooted for the American League team twice in my life. One was last year, because I couldn't stand the Phillies and had reasons to root for the Rays. The other was 1995, when I couldn't stomach the Braves winning and pulled for the Indians, the perennial losers finally making good.

My second reason for pulling for the Phils is, of course, the Yankees. Yankee fans are everywhere--I don't personally know a single Phillie fan--and they have won enough and can be plenty obnoxious about it. To boot, I was raised by a Brooklyn Dodger fan who grew up in the 1950's when the Yankees beat up on the Dodgers in the Series every year, and Yankee fans never let him hear the end of it. It's just not in me to root for the Yankees under any circumstances. Is it more than a little irrational? You bet. But I can live with that.

As for a prediction, I'm predicting I'll be wearing my iPod into work the day it's done, after the Yankees have won in six.

Eric Simon

Oh, it's hard to say I'm "rooting" for anyone, but at this point I'd probably least want the Phillies to win the World Series for a variety of reasons, beginning with the inevitable retchtacular Jayson Stark articles in particular and ending with the insufferable insolence of Phillies fans in general. I'm also fervently rooting against Shane Victorino in particular for reasons James alluded to above.

At least if the Yankees win some of the media stories will be about how they're a good team and spent a ton of money. If the Phillies win, it won't be about how good they are (they're very good), but rather about how they wanted it more, had good team chemistry, had more grission, or whatever other inane, vacuous attributes the media likes to ascribe to its champions.

So gun to my head I would prefer to see the Yankees win, with the clinching game coming on the road so I can see the dejected faces of all of the degenerate Phillies fans. I'd also like to see Joe Buck accidentally let slip some offhand racist comment about Ryan Howard so he'll be relieved of all future broadcasting duties.

As for a prediction, I'll take -- and hope for -- Yankees in five.