Jason Bay's Mystery Team

by Howard Megdal on Dec 18, 2009 1:11 PM EST

Jason Bay reportedly has a mystery team bidding on him. But beyond the Mets, who remain keenly interested and in touch with his agent Joe Urbon, nearly all of Bay's market is remains mystery at this point." Jon Heyman, SI.com, 12/17/09

Jason Bay's Mystery Team

Who could be Jason Bay's Mystery Team

Club Incognito to shatter Mets' dream

Is it Seattle, the misers of old

Who spend now like they've turned their coffee to gold

Sources say no, for Mariner love

Is restricted to those who excel with the glove

(Late update! Seattle must not have wanted Bay badly

Considering they just traded for Milton Bradley)

Or could it be Boston? Well, here's something funny

John Lackey now has all of Bay's would-be money

And if Angels want slugger whose defense is bad

They can go much cheaper, and just re-sign Vlad

And though Giants' offense needs Bay's bat and more

Their winter shopping seems limited to the Dollar Store

And while Bay would make Braves a more fearsome foe

All their Bay money is tied up in Derek Lowe

So who could it be? We've covered the ain'ts

The Toledo Mud Hens? The New Orleans Saints?

I'm guessing the guy who could actually tell you

Has a nice Brooklyn Bridge he'd be willing to sell you

This FanPost was contributed by a member of the community and was not subject to any vetting or approval process. It does not necessarily reflect the opinions, reasoning skills, or attention to grammar and usage rules held by the editors of this site.

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Comments

Haha, awesome poem

Asking a General Manager to slim down his budget is like asking an alcoholic to blow up a distillery.

by scott from peekskill on Dec 18, 2009 1:16 PM EST reply actions

Nice

I’m liking the Toledo Mud Hens reference

by dtro on Dec 18, 2009 1:16 PM EST reply actions

This should confirm Seattle is out

http://twitter.com/StoneLarry/status/6802467438 (Bradley reportedly going to Seattle)

Great poem.

by saberkeith on Dec 18, 2009 1:17 PM EST reply actions

They are trading their Oliver Perez for Bradley and saving $4M cash.

by Michkin on Dec 18, 2009 1:23 PM EST up reply actions

Oh it hurts

"We have a plan, and our plan, I like our plan'

it's Omar's world, we're just livin in it.

by Gina on Dec 18, 2009 1:34 PM EST up reply actions

Are you implying you'd have traded Perez for Bradley? Bradley has been an utter disgrace, and a problem every single place he's ever played. Thank God the Mets wanted nothing to do with him.

by Metzfan22 on Dec 18, 2009 1:50 PM EST up reply actions

I'm saying Carlos Silva has a $24M contract left (like Ollie) and he is a terrible pitcher (worse than Ollie) who would at most be a mop up guy.

And Seattle turned that sunk cost into something useful (Bradley mostly DH and sometimes LF) AND saved money in the process.

by Michkin on Dec 18, 2009 1:56 PM EST up reply actions

actually,

as it turns out, Seattle is sending $9M cash to the Cubs, so they are not saving money.

by alexSVK on Dec 18, 2009 2:56 PM EST up reply actions

Yea, but still a good deal for Seattle.

by Michkin on Dec 18, 2009 2:59 PM EST up reply actions

yeah,

not disputing that.

by alexSVK on Dec 18, 2009 3:33 PM EST up reply actions

yeah right, mystery team

and i bet there are teams interested in trading for Castillo, too!

by slowbutspeeding on Dec 18, 2009 1:31 PM EST reply actions

Agreed all around

Tired of agents and their “mystery teams”. Would love to see one FA rot because their agent overplays their hand, could it be Bay this year?

Mets have the right attitude right now, never put yourself in a position where you’re unwilling to walk away.

by DWEEEZ on Dec 18, 2009 1:34 PM EST reply actions

Ironically, wasn't O Hudson that guy last year?

I could be remembering wrong, but my recollection is he was supposed to get a few years but ended up scrambling in the end to get one year from LA.

by saberkeith on Dec 18, 2009 1:50 PM EST up reply actions

I don't think it was because of his agent

it was because of the market collapse+ teams getting smarter

"We have a plan, and our plan, I like our plan'

it's Omar's world, we're just livin in it.

by Gina on Dec 18, 2009 2:07 PM EST up reply actions

Best one yet, IMO

keep up the good work!

by HotChipWillBreakYourLegs on Dec 18, 2009 1:51 PM EST reply actions

I’m guessing the only guy who could actually tell you

Also has a nice Brooklyn Bridge he could sell you

My thoughts exactly.

No weekend spent pantsless is a wasted weekend.

by sireric on Dec 18, 2009 2:04 PM EST reply actions

terrific as usual

i love these poems

by KeithsMoustache on Dec 18, 2009 2:21 PM EST reply actions

Wait, I thought Jon Heyman only worked for Boras. Now he is spreading this mystery team for other agents too?

by Michkin on Dec 18, 2009 2:33 PM EST reply actions

mystery team is highly contagious

and chronic

by KeithsMoustache on Dec 18, 2009 2:46 PM EST up reply actions

Is THIS your Mystery Team?

by LeiterMilnerFasterStronger on Dec 18, 2009 3:04 PM EST reply actions

You got the dud!

He looks just like you, poindexter!

"He's definitely mixing it into his repertoire. That's French for 'repertoire' " - Keith Hernandez

by Catsmeat Potter-Pirbright on Dec 18, 2009 3:38 PM EST up reply actions

Great reference! Man, you never hear “Mystery Date” jokes anymore.

by TheLetter2 on Dec 21, 2009 6:16 PM EST up reply actions

duh

it’s the Oakland Raiders!

I.M. Forme
"When you get yourself into trouble is when you feel you have to do something, and then you get yourself in trouble." --Omar Minaya

by itsmetsforme on Dec 18, 2009 10:39 PM EST reply actions

That actually makes sense

Al Davis enjoys zigging.

"We have a plan, and our plan, I like our plan'

it's Omar's world, we're just livin in it.

by Gina on Dec 18, 2009 10:41 PM EST up reply actions

Great poem

"Never throw a slider to The Glider."

- Ed Charles, No. 5

by The Glider on Dec 19, 2009 12:26 AM EST reply actions

Mystery Teams and FAs

Every time I hear “Mystery Team” I just figure its the Yankees, no matter if it makes sense or not. Its not like they can’t just throw another 100 million in salary out there for no good reason.

"So basically, the Stats make no sense whatsoever."

by Mark D on Dec 19, 2009 4:11 AM EST reply actions

This.

awesome poem

"I reject your reality and substitute my own"
-Adam Savage

by blueandorange4life on Dec 19, 2009 1:35 PM EST reply actions

I got it! We sign Coco Crisp for one year as a place holder until F Mart is ready or used in a trade. The way I look at it if we had a Choo Choo we could use a Coco.

by Pumpsie on Dec 19, 2009 2:44 PM EST reply actions

Then...

The M’s bounce Milton Bradley over to us, and he starts in right. We then pick-up the recently released Boof Bonser (or did I read that the Red Sox recently did), Bartolo Colon and Chien-Ming Wang for rotation help. Mike’S weeney is signed as our first baseman.

We leave Razor Shines as 1b coach, and sign Al (Mitchell Edward George Patrick Henry) Gallagher as 3b coach. Dan Warthen is then replaced with former pitching coach Dick Pole.

We then win the award for team with the funniest names.

"Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!"
Gil Hodges IS a Hall of Famer.

by Brooklyn Dodgers Mets Fan on Dec 19, 2009 5:01 PM EST up reply actions

Not only is he a true Hall of Famer, it’s his statue that should be in the rotunda. Then it would be a Mets ball field. Want to have an area for National greats, so be it but NOT the center piece

by Pumpsie on Dec 19, 2009 5:45 PM EST up reply actions

Coco Crisp?

"Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!"
Gil Hodges IS a Hall of Famer.

by Brooklyn Dodgers Mets Fan on Dec 20, 2009 12:09 AM EST up reply actions

I know (Duh), but it sounded like a good on-topic response, anyway...

"Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!"
Gil Hodges IS a Hall of Famer.

by Brooklyn Dodgers Mets Fan on Dec 20, 2009 12:09 AM EST up reply actions

I love it! Setting current events to verse is always a winner in my book. Charles Osgood once wrote, “The news of the day is so goofy at times/It just seems to fit into couplets and rhymes.”

by TheLetter2 on Dec 21, 2009 6:20 PM EST reply actions