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(Massive Heart Attack teardrop)
Dr. Gregory Zaun House on the phone: Yes, thank you.
(People enter the room)
Dr. Omar Foreman: We have a case.
Dr. WFAN Chase: This is boring. There is nothing to diagnose, the guy is just tired. Let's give him a cortisone shot and discharge him.
Dr. Cameron: Who were you talking on the phone?
House: Mom. What's up?
Cameron: Yea, right. The patient is feeling fatigued and has joint pain. He looks hurt. Cuddy told us to take this case.
Chase: See, this is nothing.
House: Then why are you going to be paged in 3, 2, 1 ... 1... 1 ...1 ...
(beep, beep, beep, beep)
House: Foreman, do a full blood work panel and confirm his low level of Vitamin K, and high Complex B^2. Chase, go to his house and get all sport equipment you can find. Cameron, tell the patient to sign this consent form.
Cameron: This is a baseball card, not a consent form.
Foreman: How ....?
Chase: Why ...?
House: I brought my z-game today. Do you want to stay here Talking Chop or do you want to save the patient?
(some time later)
Foreman: His blood work confirmed what you predicted. Besides, he presented protein ...
House: ... S, Urea, Creatine and Ketamine. Pay attention already!
Chase: This is all I could find. Some bats have japanese letters in them. Our patient is obviously not japanese though.
House: Those are kanji, you idiot.
House: Differential diagnosis?
Foreman: I don't want to do more paperwork.
Chase: Let's break the core ...
House: You're fired.
Cameron: The patient is complaining of low blood pressure. He blames his work for this.
House: Everybody lies. Let's go see the patient.
House: Cameron, lift up your shirt.
Cameron: You want to confirm he can't produce adrenaline, but you don't want to give him meds that might screw the other tests, right?
House: Yea, that explanation works too.
House: He just need elbow surgery.
Cameron: I checked your phone log. Does your mom live in 126th Street and Roosevelt Avenue? You asked for a consult from Dr. Brain Socks PhD DDX RSVP*, didn't you?
Chase: Who is that guy in Spongebob Squarepants pajamas?
House: THAT is our next patient.
*Too busy in the doghouse planning world domination. And curing cancer. And co-writing a paper on string theory with Johan.
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