Ex-Met Limericks: Jeff Francoeur

by metman726 on Feb 12, 2011 9:41 PM EST

Hi, first off, thanks for reading my first fan post. So, I figured I could write some short limericks about some of our favorite (or not so much) ex-Mets. Round 1- Jeff Francoeur. I apologize for it sucking so badly.

There once was a man named Francoeur

Who hit about .234

He had such great grission

Swing and miss was his mission

Thank god Sandy showed him the door.

Any suggestions for future installments are greatly appreciated.

This FanPost was contributed by a member of the community and was not subject to any vetting or approval process. It does not necessarily reflect the opinions, reasoning skills, or attention to grammar and usage rules held by the editors of this site.

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the ballad of murray and mike

the great medico-journalist chass
spied red bumps on a great catcher’s ass
he cried “roids” and was wrong
now I stay off his lawn…
and remember mikes raking and stache

by neoncleon on Feb 12, 2011 10:56 PM EST reply actions

love it

"Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. But to be able to trick people year in and year out the way I did, I think that was a much greater feat." -Bob Uecker
"Who is the girl in the dugout, with the long hair? What's going on here? You have got to be kidding me. Only player personnel in the dugout. I won't say that women belong in the kitchen, but they don't belong in the dugout." -Kieth Hernandez

by metman726 on Feb 12, 2011 11:44 PM EST up reply actions

There was was a man who would swing

and thought OBP wasn’t a thing
on the scoreboard it’s not
against common sense fought
watching his at bats, it would sting

Hey, wait! I'm having one of those things. You know? A headache with pictures?

by KeithsMoustache on Feb 13, 2011 12:21 AM EST reply actions 4 recs

There "once" was a man....

by BrockRocks on Feb 16, 2011 4:48 PM EST up reply actions

yeah, probably makes more sense your way

Hey, wait! I'm having one of those things. You know? A headache with pictures?

by KeithsMoustache on Feb 16, 2011 9:25 PM EST up reply actions

Slight correction

Omar showed him the door, but alas. Here’s one.

There was a man with a grin
Who naturally knew how to win
Except for one thing
As proved by his swing
His hack made him a has-been

It's a triumph of number crunching over the human spirit...aaaaaand, it’s about time. -- Play-by-Play Announcer, The Simpsons.

by MookieTheCat on Feb 13, 2011 12:32 AM EST reply actions

Oh

I couldnt remember who let him go and baseball reference said he was granted free agency in november so i figured it was sandy plus i didnt feel like bringing up omar in this happy limerick…he will get his own eventually

by metman726 on Feb 13, 2011 12:55 AM EST up reply actions

Talkin' 3 Year/$36M Blues

There once was a southpaw named LOLie
Who Omar did sign in his folly
But his pitching it sucked
And now we’re all f***ed
Only Boras the Agent is jolly

My wife's name is Mrs. Coleman and she likes me, Bub.

by Ownbey4Mex on Feb 13, 2011 6:45 AM EST reply actions 7 recs

77 words.

You got lucky this time kid. But next time: BAM! I’ll hit you with a: This should be a FanShot

Just kidding. This is really good. You should do them for all the really bad ex-Mets. It would only take a decade or so to do, but you could probably get it done. ;)

"go watch another episode of dahrma and greg you butt nutt"
-lohaus#54
The fan formely known as 0(+> (pronounced MetFanWithaPlan)

by JoeBighead on Feb 13, 2011 9:11 AM EST reply actions

I'll recycle this one from last year.

An Ode To Jeff Francoeur:

His problem was said to be mental
A stray walk? I’d bet accidental
Good pitch recognition
Of his own volition?
He sooner would fly Continental

by Eric Simon on Feb 13, 2011 12:57 PM EST reply actions 5 recs

Why I won't quit my day job to write limericks

There once was a closer named Frankie
With a contract more fit for a Yankee
At his own sweet request
He receives quite a vest
And he beats the old man when he’s cranky

My wife's name is Mrs. Coleman and she likes me, Bub.

by Ownbey4Mex on Feb 13, 2011 1:39 PM EST reply actions 5 recs

Francoeur Avenue lives!

"Blinding ignorance does mislead us. O! Wretched mortals, open your eyes!"
Gil Hodges IS a Hall of Famer.

AA Gamethread Embiggening Record Holder- 453 posts (10/03/10)

by Brooklyn Dodgers Mets Fan on Feb 13, 2011 4:20 PM EST via mobile reply actions

Not unlike Kuato

Horrible to watch, but a great interview.

It's a triumph of number crunching over the human spirit...aaaaaand, it’s about time. -- Play-by-Play Announcer, The Simpsons.

by MookieTheCat on Feb 13, 2011 10:48 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs

HA HA HA

you think this is the real Quaid?

HELLO HELLO MR WILPON... BUY THAT MANSION. WE DONT NEED A CONDO.

by kendynamo on Feb 14, 2011 5:48 PM EST up reply actions

There once was a scrub named Cora

You’d find better bats in Andorra
AA was distressed
When they gave him a vest
Overvaluing veteran aura

by njk237 on Feb 13, 2011 6:02 PM EST reply actions

Not bad; her'es my version

There once was a shortstop named Cora
Whose offensive stats were a horror
His job none could wrest
On account of that vest
’Til he finally was shown through the door-a

What's the score, boys?
What did Bugs Bunny do?
What's with the Carrot League baseball today?

by StorkFan on Feb 13, 2011 8:15 PM EST up reply actions

A jacket clad predictor

Had this to say about Victor:
I can fix him in ten
So hand Duquette that pen!
Trade proposals should be looked at strict-er

by njk237 on Feb 13, 2011 6:12 PM EST reply actions

There once was a Met named Francoeur

Whose discipline was quite poor.
He swung with a great passion,
Drawing walks was not his fashion.
Lucky for him there’s still Dayton Moore.

"And that's why anybody who invested with Lenny Dykstra should really call that number. Lawyers are standing by."

by BobbyV_Incognito on Feb 13, 2011 7:12 PM EST reply actions 2 recs

There once was a man named Omir
Who made Mets fans quiver with fear
He could not hit
But he had lots of grit
When he left no one shed a tear

by Michael Green on Feb 13, 2011 7:24 PM EST reply actions 1 recs

this is awesome

Kicking knowledge in the face.

by BlackOps on Feb 15, 2011 5:02 PM EST up reply actions

There one was a man named Heath Bell

Whose worth Omar could not foretell
We got John Adkins,
Ben Johnson, not wins
In hindsight that trade was just swell

by bjk3047 on Feb 13, 2011 10:39 PM EST reply actions

i should really get back to work

but…

there once was a broheem called frenchy
who got mad when he rode the benchy
some gave him a pass
others saw he was ass
and could not deny his bad stenchy

ass would be a great description of that poem as well.

HELLO HELLO MR WILPON... BUY THAT MANSION. WE DONT NEED A CONDO.

by kendynamo on Feb 14, 2011 5:53 PM EST reply actions

Eh...I'd stick to your day job.

Chamption of the R.A. Dickey Face contest and "Cromulent Photoshopper Extraordinaire" of Amazin' Avenue!

by Steve Schreiber on Feb 14, 2011 9:11 PM EST up reply actions 2 recs

there once was a man named ollie

who just flat out sucked. no limrick needed.

"it's not easy being green"-kermit the frog
"we the mets are an improved ball club, now we lose in extra innings"-casy stengal
i cant spell a nosebleed

by rexthejet on Feb 16, 2011 10:14 PM EST reply actions 3 recs

An ode to a soon-to-be ex-Met

His ability to pitch was long past
Big leads he would always blow fast
His agent did say
12/36 you must pay
for the rights to the next Sandy Koufax

"The Mets are gonna be amazin'!" - Casey Stengel
"Bounding and astounding!" - Clyde Frazier

by Russ on Feb 18, 2011 11:54 AM EST reply actions 2 recs

The greatest Met?

There once was a pitcher from Fresno
Whose powerful legs let him throw so
Then came a sad day
He was traded away
Years later he tosses his no-no.

Mookie Wilson still hoping to win it for New York. 3 and 2 the count, and the pitch by Stanley, and a ground ball, trickling, it is a fair ball...GETS BY BUCKNER...rounding 3rd Knight...the Mets will win the ball game. The Mets win. They win! --Bob Murphy

by Unga on Feb 26, 2011 12:23 PM EST reply actions