What if we were privvy to the Mets talking shop? What if we were on their corporate network, or their listserv? What kind of tidbits are floating around on the Mets' private email list?
I think we might find that the contents are more inane than we'd expect. A few media organizations that I've worked for have used new-fangled social-networking-style communication sites (think Facebook, but for single organizations), and most of our conversation is very practical, with the odd ribbing thrown in for good measure. Jammer, our fictional site, will give us a look into the doldrums of daily communication between ballplayers on the Mets, maybe.
And, yes, I know. This is a pretty blatant ripoff of the excellent work by the writers at The Dugout, but allow this as an homage, please. It has its own theme, and hopefully - hopefully - it will make you laugh just the same.
Man, I hate writers. What they mean I'm not a player? I crush a lot.
Scott's Chin: In batting practice.
Eh man, don't worry. At least joo got dat music career to fall back on.
Oh, joo ain't Eek-A-Mouse? My b.
Hey, eh. Don't worry about the writers. Just give em bland answers, smile real nice and don't read 'em.
It's worked for me.
Jo. Anyone seen my glasses? TC just tole me I gotta get on base more.
TC The Chief
What? You wear glasses?
Well, joo know, the ones with no glass in em. But I gotta look right to play right.. right?
TC The Chief
Kids these days.
Jason Isringhausen liked this
Yo who turned off my Daddy Jankee? That's not right.
Well, it was no Riverdance, am I right Murph?
For the millionth time...
What, you don't like my Celine Dion, eh?
Not. Right. Don't make me go get K-Rod.
Anyone seen my copy of Gravity's Rainbow? Haven't seen it in a day or two.
Is that what you call the super slow knuckler, dude?
Ha, I think I saw that with Thole's missing home run ball and the loch ness monster.
Hey, I got, like, a better batting average, dude.
Choke up some more rook!
At least he ain't wearing eyeliner.
Eye black dude, Eye black.
Anyone have a first base glove? Heard someone say I was on first today.