FanPost

A day in the life of a Supreme Court Justice, Mets fan

Following AA tradition of slice-of-life stories:

6:00AM Wake up, turn on the computer and check Metsblog comment section.

6:01AM LOL. Just kidding! That's why there is the Rule #10. Instead, I check yesterday's recap at AA. I got the embiggening title again, F*ck yeah!

6:20AM Eat cheerios for breakfast. Hey, R.A. Dickey and Piazza eat them too, why can't I? On the other hand, Ollie had Froot Loops. Maybe I should eat an apple, but I can't eat 2.

7:30AM Arrive at work and we all meet Judge S.S. in her chambers. Last week, she kept annoying the rest of us with her "Got Ringzzzz". As a birthday present, I give her a gift basket with Jeter memorabilia (including a fake signature on a baseball). All the judges laugh hysterically.

7:40AM Judge S.S. haz a sad is not pleased. Take a picture of her face with my phone. Keep wondering what Instagram filter I'll use: "Sunset" or "Douche". Choose "Douche". This reminds me of Cole Hamels.

8:20AM Go back to my basement chambers and start working.

8:22AM Bored at work. Stopped writing this ruling for a moment and checked Dubs batting stats at Fangraphs and google images. He's good looking and all, but he is not a "specimen". Nor is Muscles.

8:30AM Continued to write the ruling. Decided to troll Mets fans and blame Beltran the offense for our projected pythag record and the lack of Champtionships. I'll write my next ruling in haiku.

10:15AM Received an email from Judge A.S.. He's bragging about the Phillies rotation and links to more articles saying how awesome Hday1 is. He think's they should re-sign Hamels for 7/250. Reply with these links from TedQuarters.

10:19AM Judge A.S. replies back. He says he doesn't care, because he likes Twilight too, though now he thinks they should offer "only 5/200". He states how awesome Howard is, while bashing Utley for not playing through injury. He thinks we need more veteran's presence. I'll stick to the Mets homegrown talent, thanks!

11:00AM Check AA again. Read MTC interpretation of the bankruptcy law in the Madoff case. Wonder wth what is he doing in Africa, when his law interpretation and writing skills are better than of those petitions I receive. Shellfish MTC.

12:30PM Have shellfish lunch with hubby and mother-in-law. She wants me to discuss my ongoing cases. Yeah. Then she rambles about North Korea. "Hey no POLITIKZ"! I just keep playing with the small red flag that came with the dish. I wish there was a flag button in real life. HELLO HELLO MR. CANNONLAZR! Sigh. Hubby rants about how the Mets lost 2 in a row and asks for another beer.

02:30PM I pass by my office assistant. I wonder what is he is always mumbling about, but never stopped to ask. Meh, it shouldn't be anything important. He has a matchbox with him. I didn't even know he smoked.

03:12PM Read a 2 line petition made by a lawyer. THIS SHOULD BE A FANSHOT. Have they even read the Bill of Wrongz?

05:01PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:02PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:03PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:04PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:05PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:06PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:07PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. 1 "Keith" comment.

05:08PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:09PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:10PM Bored at work. Check AA again. Press "Reload" on the browser. No new stories or comments.

05:11PM Read Terry's lineup card. Cedeno leading off? Seriously? Think what would I do if it meant having Kirk leading off and Cedeno batting 8th. I don't make any promises though, last time didn't end well.

05:55PM Post an artistic Dickey MS Paint in AA. I think they liked it.

05:56PM Post another Dickey MS Paint. And another. And another. And another. And another. And another. And another. And another. And another. Well, that was a very productive day.

06:30PM Rush back home to watch the game. Pass by a pretty young brunette and wonder if I knew her. Oh right. That must be a good omen for tonight's game. Reminds me of when I was young.

07:00PM Hubby says he'll cook today. He asks to borrow my cookbook. THERE IS NO BOOK!

11:00PM Adjust my fantasy team. TRAID Ray Ass for Beltran+prospect. Still 2nd place. I should traid for Eckstein for the LULZ. At least I would get points for using the WIN METHOD.

11:15PM Go to sleep. Daughter still watching tv shows. Probably vampires or something.

"The events depicted in this story are fictitious. Any similarity to any person living or dead is merely 90% coincidental. The other half is made up."

This FanPost was contributed by a member of the community and was not subject to any vetting or approval process. It does not necessarily reflect the opinions, reasoning skills, or attention to grammar and usage rules held by the editors of this site.

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