FanPost

AAOP: Procrastination Edition

Frankly I wasn't planning on posting, but I started commenting on others, so I guess its only fair that you can pick apart mine as well. It's short and bereft of graphs and things like that, but I'm sure I can work in a Melanie gif at some point.

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Lets beef up this lineup!

Jose Bautista!

Jays have been open to trading him, we can easily take his 14 million contract. They'll want Syndergaard back, Sandy will laugh and offer Gee. They'll switch sandy to the french language ticket line just to fuck with him. Eventually they settle on a package with Montero, Duda(whose AL value is considerably higher), and a lower prospect with potential. Not a Dom Smith not not a Corey Vaugun either. Yona? Sounds right. They get immediate back of rotation guy w, immediate young cost controlled DH, and future top of the line starter. We get some decent protection for Wright and the love of every caller on WFAN.

Jhonny Peralta!

Free Agent signing. Solid right handed bat, average WAR of 2.4 over the last 5 years(including suspended time) I'm thinking 2/21 range gets this done. Not sexy, but positive production from a difficult position to staff.

Nyjer Morgan!

Free Agent signing. 1 year 2 million(plus some incentives). I'm allowed a crazy signing. This is my crazy signing. Great year in Japan, and potential to be like a Marlon Byrd type result. Marlon's best WAR year before 2013, was 3.4 Nyjers best was 3.3 If not, we still have EY JR, MDD, and Puello hopefully around midseason. Win/Win. We get him at 2 mil plus incentives because he's sick of eating dolphin.

Keep Bullpen Decent.

Does San Diego still want Daniel Murphy? Do we still want Luke Gregerson? I hope so, because that is now happening. Murphy for Gregerson.

LaTroy resigns for 1 year 1.5 PLUS a promise to be the SNY studio guy when he retries. Listened to him on MLB radio all year long and the guy is smart, honest, and funny. Great, great organization guy. He replaces Bobby O, who joins our staff as a taxi squad LOOGY. Yes I'm joking but only sort of because I'm sure Jessie Orosco is pitching in MLB but just under an assumed name.

Keep, Rice, Atch, Parnell, Black, Germen, et AL

Don't Screw With Solid Starting Staff

Niese, Wheeler, Gee, Mejia plus MYSTERY STARTER!

In Januray Sandy gets 3 large boxes. He puts Johan Santana in one box Matsuzaka in the second box, and Harang in the last box. We do some order of contest that requires skill, chance, and passion wherein the winner gets to pick one of the boxes and viola, we have mystery starter. The mystery starter will get a one year contract worth 1 million dollars. The other two just hope that Sandy remembers to open the boxes at the end of the contest because we don't kill our starting pitchers because what is this Cleveland? If Harang is not picked he eventually forms a metal band because HARANG! would be the most metal bandiest name possible.

So lineup looks like this:

Nyger Morgan-LF

Wilmer Flores- 2b

El Capitan de Americano -3B

Jose Bautista -RF

Jhonny Peralta -ss

Ike Davis -1b

Travis d'Arnuad -c

Juan Largares -CF

This puts NO pressure on Ike. He just has to play George Foster and hit some home runs and maybe make a rap video because I would pay cash money to see Ike Davis rap because rapping mets are the awesomest.

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If Wilmer fails, we put EY or Turner there.

Travis DarNOO and Juan Lagares just have to concentrate on getting good pitchers and developing. Whatever they contribute here is gravy but much healthier than gravy.

We added about 33 million of Salary, and lost Murphy's 5, so about 28 million to your post-arb total of 55 equals approximately 83 million. This will give us the flexibility needed to sign both Trout and Harper in 4 years. Bwwwa haaaaaa haaaaa ha!

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Enjoy!

This FanPost was contributed by a member of the community and was not subject to any vetting or approval process. It does not necessarily reflect the opinions, reasoning skills, or attention to grammar and usage rules held by the editors of this site.

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