The Mets have a lot of problems right now, the least of which is probably the performance of their fifth starter. However, has anyone else noticed that Nelson Figueroa has been -- not to get too technical here -- pretty effing crummy of late? He was the Princess of Flushing after his first two starts against the Brewers and Nationals, but he has been mostly dreadful over his last four starts.

A little arithmetic gives us 20.1 innings pitched over those last four starts, including 17 runs allowed, 18 walks, 27 hits and three Mets losses. That's more than two baserunners every inning and an RA of more than 7.5. I realize that Figgy got off to a good start, and I don't enjoy ragging on him because he's a good guy and a fun story. Nevertheless, you've got a tough row to hoe if you're going to argue that he is really giving the Mets a good chance to win every time out. Or any time out, for that matter.

Pedro Martinez is throwing in Port St. Lucie, but there is no immediate timetable for his return and I think many would be surprised if he returned before June. Tony Armas is pitching pretty well in New Orleans. Despite a 1-3 record, he has a 3.02 ERA and a solid 36-to-11 strikeout-to-walk ratio in 47.2 innings.

The Mets are said to be considering calling up Adam Bostick to pitch on Wednesday, though he hasn't been anything special in seven starts this season. His 3.83 ERA is acctually second on the team to Armas, though the 26 strikeouts and 16 walks in 40 innings is hardly the stuff of legend. Claudio Vargas has made two starts since being called up to Triple-A and, though his 4.91 ERA is uninspiring, his 11-to-1 strikeout-to-walk ratio in 11 innings is a good start.

Freddy Garcia is out there, but he won't be ready until July at the earliest.

(what's this?)

Mr. Met: Damion Easley, +13.6%
Mr. Regret: Nelson Figueroa, -41.9%
(Non-)Clutchiest Plate Appearance: Easley homerun off Perez, +10.6%
(Non-)Clutchiest Pitch: Flores 2-run double off Figueroa, -24.5%
WPA by Offense: +3.5%
WPA by Pitchers: -53.5%
WPA by Opponent: +0.0%

• If there was ever any doubt before, it should be clear as Crystal Gravy that Jorge Sosa needs to hit the road. The Mets will have to eat $1.5 million or so, but to keep him on the roster at the expense of Joe Smith is quite simply bad baseball. Matt Wise is ready to come off the disabled list and the Mets need to make a decision; let's hope they make the right one.
• Smith's presence in the bullpen is even more critical in light of Duaner Sanchez's recent poor outings and Aaron Heilman's ongoing struggles.
• Billy Wagner struck out the side in a meaningless ninth inning. When you look at closers around the league crumbling before our very eyes you really start to recognize what a terrific signing Wagner turned out to be. Four years and $40+ million for a 34-year-old closer seemed like a lot of money at the time, but he really is one of the few dominant, dependable closers in baseball.

The shine appears to have come off of Nelson Figueroa, who has walked twelve batters to just eight strikeouts over his past three starts, failing to break a 42 game score in any of those outings. Things were looking up after his first two starts of the season, as Figgy posted a 13-to-4 strikeout-to-walk ratio and notched individual game scores of 64 and 68. It was a feel-good story for everyone involved: from the fans, to Figgy's family celebrating in Billy Wagner's luxury box at Shea, to Figgy himself.

Did you think it would last forever? These last few starts have been a window into why Figueroa was out of Major League Baseball for five years. His season ERA is up to 4.81 and the odds are pretty good that it'll keep going up, especially if he continues to allow more than two baserunners every inning. I like him, and I continue to root for him, and I still think he's probably a better option in the starting rotation than Jorge Sosa. One of them is likely to get the boot once Matt Wise is ready to come off the disabled list, something that could happen as soon as Friday. The alternative would be to send Joe Smith back to New Orleans, but, unlike Sosa, Smith actually adds something to the bullpen picture. Sosa seemingly only adds runs to the other team's docket.

The Mets still seem to be in Figueroa's corner, though with every start he continues to detract from his own case. He got a bit unlucky with the Blake DeWitt inside-the-parker last night, but even if Ryan Church immediately recognized that the ball had stayed in the yard DeWitt probably winds up on third. David Wright's throwing error on the subsequent play would have chased DeWitt home anyway, so Church's confusion doesn't absolve Figueroa of that extra run allowed.

Pitching aside, the Mets' offense was pucking fathetic last night. They had baserunners galore, but went something like 2-for-13 with runners in scoring position, with Wright responsible for two of those missed opportunities -- both strikeouts -- including one in the bottom of the eighth. Overall the Mets struck out twelve times, including four times looking (!), which is pretty amazing, I think.

The whole offense looks terrible right now. Church and Brian Schneider are both hitting over .300 and, though batting average isn't the go-to stat it once was, it's at least some indication of how well someone is swinging the bat. The Mets' regulars who weren't with the Nationals last season are hitting .260, .265, .250, .216, .232 and .219. Some of them are drawing walks and getting on base in other ways, but those batting averages are ghastly. Tim McCarver must be rolling over in his grave.

Mr. Met: Brian Schneider, +9.7%
Mr. Regret: Nelson Figueroa, -29.6%
(Non-)Clutchiest Plate Appearance: Castillo strikeout (looking!) to end the game, -14.3%
(Non-)Clutchiest Pitch: DeWitt ISTP homerun off Figueroa, -29.1%
WPA by Offense: -33.1%
WPA by Pitchers: -16.9%
WPA by Opponent: +0.0%

Well whaddaya know? The Mets proved me wrong in so many ways I'm inclined to think that they read my pregame comments and moved to act in complete and utter discordance of same. Here are some of the things I flurked up.

The Mets would lose the game

This one had all the makings of an old-school Mets-Braves bloodbath, with the ever-confident Braves playing the part of the Braves and the downtrodden Mets playing the part of the Mets. In this performance, Intrepid hurler John Smoltz would be played by the crusty and seemingly-agless John Smoltz, while Nelson Figueroa would be astutely cast as Anonymous Met run cougher-upper.

We've seen it a hundred times before, yet on this day the principals eschewed the same tired script and applied their improvisational background to craft a scene that was at once refreshing and natural. John Smoltz had nothing resembling his best stuff (except against David Wright), and the Mets plated four runs in four innings before Smoltz was driven from the game with a sour puss and hurt feelings. Coughing up an epic blast to Raul Casanova can have that effect, but more on suavely-named Mets catchers later.

Smoltz's fastball was noticeably slower than we've grown accustomed to; perhaps as much as five miles per hour, enough to transform the Braves' ace from "godless killing machine" to "pretty good pitcher that we can kinda wail on". Smoltz's control was spotty to boot, and the Mets took advantage to the tune of seven hits -- three for extra bases -- and two walks before Smoltz's premature ouster after just four innings of work.

For his part, Figueroa hung in there long enough to win his second game of the season, but his performance was not the sort of thing we write short stories about. Seven hits plus three walks (equals ten baserunners!) in 5.1 innings was enough to get the job done today, but a pitching line like that would normally be a 4-1 loss when you're facing Smoltz. All of this is not to rag on Figueroa; he has been a pleasant surprise for the Mets, exceedingly adequate as the fifth horse in the stable. If we consider the laundry list of has-beens and never-will-bes that the Mets have miscast as starting pitchers over the past few seasons, Figueroa has been a good smell in Stinkville. For those with shorter memories than my own -- either by choice or otherwise -- here are some of those retreads and ne'ertreads:

Kazuhisa Ishii (2005)
Alay Soler (2006)
Dave Williams (2006)
Jose Lima (2006)
[G|J]eremi Gonzalez (2006)
Brian Lawrence (2007)
Chan Ho Park (2007

Figueroa has already outperformed each and every one of those losers, and though the shine might come off this turd at some point, anything Figgy does from here on out is gravy. He has been far better than even my best-case expectations.

The bottom of the lineup would be teh sux0rs

I was 73% wrong about this. Endy Chavez did his part to suck up plate-apps and spit back outs, though he did manage to draw a walk, an event that should equally horrify both man and child. Figueroa picked up his first base-knock in fifteen years with his infield single in the second, so that's a base hit more than I thought he would get.

Number one catcher Raul Casanova (crikey!) had his best game as a Met, going 3-for-4 including a two-run homer off of Smoltz, raising his OPS 213 points in the process. His offense was looking sparse to that point, and it may very well stumble back into uselessness starting tomorrow, but for one afternoon he made us forget that our regular numero uno is actually Brian Schneider, staph infection and all. Casanova has also thrown out two-of-three would-be base-stealers, a percentage rivaling that of my hyphen-usage in this very sentence (seriously; go back and re-read it). So he's got that going for him.

But enough about the Figueroas and Casanovas of the world. The real star of the game was Carlos Delgado, who broke out of his weeks-long slump with two homeruns: one to the opposite field and one mammoth shot up the scoreboard in right-center. He also picked up two walks -- one intentional -- and on foam-finger day at Shea he was 1-for-1 in allegorical middle-fingers-to-the-fans, sending their pleas for a curtain call to the dugout answering machine.

Gary Cohen and Ron Darling ruminated on Delgado's decision for a solid ten minutes, and ultimately Cohen came to the following salient conclusion: Fans want players to be as animated and emotional as they are. When the Mets lose, fans expect the players to be pissed off, frustrated and otherwise upset. Similarly, when a player like Delgado busts out of a long slump, fans celebrate the relief and excitement of the event and they want the player -- in this case Delgado -- to celebrate along with them. Delgado took a pass, saying after the game that he had only taken two previous curtain calls: when he hit four homeruns with the Blue Jays a few years back and after his 400th homerun in 2006 with the Mets. This wasn't the right time for him, apparently. Of all of the silly and obnoxious things that Mets fans do, I think curtain calls are fun and I generally encourage their solicitation.

Other stuff

Luis Castillo is suddenly swinging a hot bat, picking up three more hits on Sunday including his second extra-base hit of the season, a double in the sixth. He has raised his on-base percentage to a solid .369, though his slugging percentage is a depressingly low .311. He is 6-for-6 in stolen bases, and he has been adroit in the field, so despite a horrendous stretch there he appears to be settling into the role we always thought he would. He will manifestly never hit for any power, ever, but if he can get on base at a .380 pace, swipe some bags and remain defensively adept at second base, then none of us can honestly claim that he's not who we thought he was, to paraphrase the late, great Dennis Green (ed note: Dennis Green is still alive).

So, as I alluded to in the pregame notes, after all of the trials and tribulations of the first four weeks of the season, the Mets are two games over .500 and within shouting distance of first in the NL East. They haven't played well, and their record reflects that, but they play their next three games against a pretty crummy Pirates team, and face the prospect of heading to Arizona next week at least a game or two better than they are now. The Diamondbacks are the best team in the league right now, and unlike last season their run differential actually supports their lofty record. The Mets are right where their run differential says they should be, but they'll likely have to get a lot better than that if they want to outpace their division the rest of the way.

I don't even have anything to say. This giagantic jumping cat says it all. This game was ugly with a capital fugly. There were too many horrible managerial decisions to count (editor's note: there were 134). So many ill-advised bunt calls and horribly-executed bunts. The officiating wasn't great, but the Mets' didn't do themselves any favors at the plate either. I called it at approximately 11:53pm:

The only way the Mets are scoring is if Hanrahan throws one away.

Two minutes later Damion Easley scooted home from third on a wild pitch by Joel Hanrahan and the Mets' were 3-2 victors. The pitching was very good; Nelson Figueroa was terrific again, the bullpen was tremendous, and the Mets didn't even have to use Scott Schoeneweis.

It's amazing how bad this lineup looks when Carlos Beltran isn't playing. A 4-8 of Delgado-Pagan-Clark-Casanova-Castillo was just death, combining to go 4-for-25 (including two at-bats by Endy Chavez in Brady Clark's stead). Anyway, that's all I've got for this one. Go back and read the comments from the game thread to get a feel for what the game was like to watch. Or, just stick spoons in your eyes. Either way.

The Mets head to Philly tonight as Johan Santana takes on Cole Hamels.

Yay! The Mets have an off-day on Thursday and I was really dreading having to languish through nearly two days of bitter depression had the Mets found a way to lose the last game of the series to the Marlins. Thankfully, the Mets put the hurt on Florida last night, clobbering them by a score of 13-0 that the chortling horse to the right was kind enough to illustrate. Following the prepoculous suckfest that was Tuesday night's game it was nice to sit back and just enjoy a laugher. Here are some things that were awesome about last night.

Oliver Perez was dominant

Six innings pitched, five hits, one walk, eight strikeouts, nary a run. Ollie tossed just 93 pitches -- 59 for strikes -- and probably would have gone back out for the seventh if Willie didn't want to get his relievers some work in advance of tomorrow's mini hiatus. The 8-to-1 strikeout-to-walk ratio is something I could definitely get used to. Perez struck out almost nine batters per nine innings last year, but he also walked more than four. If he can keep the strikeout rate steady and drop the walk rate to three per nine innings (3-to-1 strikeout-to-walk ratio) he is going to have an incredible year. With Pedro Martinez on the shelf for 4-6 weeks (I'm guessing that'll be stretched to two months), the Mets need all the help they can get from Perez and John Maine, who will start against the Braves on Friday.

David Wright is teh r0x

Wright went 3-for-5 with a homerun, a double and three RBIs, and the double probably would have been a homerun in any park that doesn't have Dolphins Stadium's ginormous left-field scoreboard wall thingy. Wright also made two terrific plays in the field and didn't even muck them up by making wayward throws to first. The "M-V-P" chants from the mostly Met fan crowd were premature, but you've gotta love visiting team chants from the hometown crowd.

Angel Pagan is the real deal?

I'm not drinking from the Kool-Aid just yet, but I'll gladly eat crow if Pagan turns in a decent month while Moises Alou is in traction. He has four hits in ten at-bats and, perhaps more surprisingly, three walks in three games. Two of his four hits were doubles, so he has a delightfully satisfying .400/.500/.600 batting line so far this season. He picked up another two hits last night, and he's giving Willie plenty of excuses to keep Endy Chavez on the bench where he belongs. Regression to the mean is a dirty, dirty whore, but the longer Pagan can keep her waiting in the rain the better off we'll all be.

Nelson Figueroa is here

He might not be here for long, but you can't help but feel good for Nellie. He first popped up on the radar for most people when he was traded to the Phillies in 2000 in the multi-player deal that sent Curt Schilling to the Diamondbacks. He missed all of 2005 following rotator cuff surgery and spent 2006 with Triple-A New Orleans, then a Washington Nationals affiliate. He played 2007 with Los Dorados de Chihuahua of the Mexican League before heading to Taiwan in September of last year to join the Uni-President Lions of the Chinese Professional Baseball League for their playoff run. He won the first game of the first round playoff series before appearing in three games in the championship series -- Games 1, 4 and 7 -- winning them all and being named series MVP. (Source = Wikipedia).

Ryan Church needs a homerun slogan

When Church desposited his two-run bomb into the right-field bleachers in the second inning, I blurted out "Time to go to Church!" without even really thinking. Kim looked at me like I was from another planet, so I repeated it, "Time to go to Church!", in case she hadn't actually heard me the first time. She had, apparently, but even her indifference towards my impromptu slogan-creating awesomeness wasn't enough to dampen my spirits. I'm not sure if it'll stick, and I'm willing to consider alternatives (leave 'em in the comments!), but until something better comes along, whenever Ryno parks one there'll be at least one guy in Jersey shouting, "Time to go to Church!"