I just got back from the oral surgeon following the completely-painless extraction of a couple of wisdom teeth. I'm a bit of a worrier when it comes to this sort of thing, and I have to admit that the anticipation of the procedure was at least fifty times worse than the actual performance of same. The whole thing took maybe ten minutes, and all I felt was some light scraping and some pressure as my teeth were being wriggled free. The extractions were followed by a trip to CVS to pick up some vicodin and then a stop at the grocery store for drinkable yogurt, pudding, applesauce and soup. I just popped my first vicodin and I have to say that I'm well on my way to Hollywood elite status.

Thankfully, the prescription painkillers have left me blissfully numb, with nary a care for the Mets' stupendous bungling of last night's game against the Nationals. Now, obviously the Mets shan't be expected to win all eighteen-some-odd games from Washington this year, but the pitching really stunk up the joint something fierce, as Oliver Perez was unable to hang on to a three-run fifth-inning lead. Perez and Aaron Heilman combined to allow seven runs in the fifth and sixth innings, effectively putting the game out of reach. "Effectively" became "undoubtedly" when Jorge Sosa coughed up three more runs in the seventh, and the Mets coasted from there en route to a 10-5 drubbing.

The offense doesn't get a free pass in this one, as they collectively stranded five runners in scoring position and failed to come up with the big hit on numerous occasions. Carlos Delgado took another oh-fer as he watched his average plummet to .198. Jose Reyes went 1-for-5 and is batting .259 while David Wright went 0-for-4 with a walk as his average fell below .300 for the season (of course, unlike Delgado or Reyes, Wright has 19 walks and 15 extra-base hits, so his overall batting line is plenty healthy).

I'd have more to say, but my motor skills are rapidly deteriorating. The good news is that I believe the server problems we've been having the past two days are behind us, so we'll have a regular swag contest and game thread tonight. So if you'll excuse me, I have some heavy machinery to go operate.

Beating the Phillies is certainly fun, even when it takes seven pitchers to do so.

The arms

Oliver Perez threw 5.2 scoreless innings and struck out seven: Good. He also walked five, including Pedro Feliz on four pitches: Bad. I'm not going to harp on it just yet because the results have been good, but Ollie has walked 12 batters in 21.2 innings this season and sports a gaudy 1.48 WHIP. I'm no baseball expert, but allowing a a baserunner-and-a-half every inning isn't a great recipe for success.

Pedro Feliciano was bad, allowing a single to Greg Dobbs and a walk to Eric Bruntlett (!) to load the bases with one out in the bottom of the eighth. Feliciano left without having retired a batter, and was relieved by Aaron Heilman. Heilman induced a flyball out to left that Angel Pagan bungled into an RBI single. The Bulldog shook off the lousy defense behind him and came back to strike out Geoff Jenkins and Jayson Werth, co-authors of the forthcoming book, How Not to Get the Run in from Third: Ridiculous Spellings of Common First Names and Other Astute Observations.

The sticks

The Mets' 4-5-6 hitters went 0-for-12 with no runs batted in, but their 1-2-3 hitters went 6-for-12 with all four runs batted in. Despite apparently rediscovering his allergy to walks, Jose Reyes continues to swing the bat well since his talk with Carlos Beltran a few days ago. Interestingly, Beltran has been in a funk ever since, so maybe Reyes needs to impart some of his own advice. On the field, Reyes picked up a double and a two-run homer in four trips to the plate, scoring two runs and igniting the offense as only he can.

Luis Castillo reached base twice in four plate-apps. Oliver Perez reached base twice in two plate-apps. Just some food for thought. Meanwhile, Brian Schneider continues to reach base at a solid rate, despite each of his 16 hits this season going for singles and nothing more. A .383 OBP from your catcher is a nice luxury, but the zero extra-base hits still leave his OPS below the .700 mark. Even Paul Lo Duca hit the occasional two-bagger.

Anything else?

Anyone suggesting that Pat Burrell be the answer at first next year should Mark Teixeira sign elsewhere should consider this: He hit .220/.370/.424 away from CBP last season and .295/.430/586 within the friendly confines. He *did* hit very nice .254/.383/.517 on the road in 2006, so maybe last year was an aberration. Burrell has patience and power, and a lead glove to boot. The Phillies have no choice but to play him in left, but the Mets are likely to have a vacancy next year at first. Delgado almost certainly won't be back, and the Mets may balk at a $20+ million price tag for Teixeira. A shorter, cheaper deal to someone like Burrell could make a lot of sense for the Mets, especially with Teix going for 7/$150 or more.

Yay! The Mets have an off-day on Thursday and I was really dreading having to languish through nearly two days of bitter depression had the Mets found a way to lose the last game of the series to the Marlins. Thankfully, the Mets put the hurt on Florida last night, clobbering them by a score of 13-0 that the chortling horse to the right was kind enough to illustrate. Following the prepoculous suckfest that was Tuesday night's game it was nice to sit back and just enjoy a laugher. Here are some things that were awesome about last night.

Oliver Perez was dominant

Six innings pitched, five hits, one walk, eight strikeouts, nary a run. Ollie tossed just 93 pitches -- 59 for strikes -- and probably would have gone back out for the seventh if Willie didn't want to get his relievers some work in advance of tomorrow's mini hiatus. The 8-to-1 strikeout-to-walk ratio is something I could definitely get used to. Perez struck out almost nine batters per nine innings last year, but he also walked more than four. If he can keep the strikeout rate steady and drop the walk rate to three per nine innings (3-to-1 strikeout-to-walk ratio) he is going to have an incredible year. With Pedro Martinez on the shelf for 4-6 weeks (I'm guessing that'll be stretched to two months), the Mets need all the help they can get from Perez and John Maine, who will start against the Braves on Friday.

David Wright is teh r0x

Wright went 3-for-5 with a homerun, a double and three RBIs, and the double probably would have been a homerun in any park that doesn't have Dolphins Stadium's ginormous left-field scoreboard wall thingy. Wright also made two terrific plays in the field and didn't even muck them up by making wayward throws to first. The "M-V-P" chants from the mostly Met fan crowd were premature, but you've gotta love visiting team chants from the hometown crowd.

Angel Pagan is the real deal?

I'm not drinking from the Kool-Aid just yet, but I'll gladly eat crow if Pagan turns in a decent month while Moises Alou is in traction. He has four hits in ten at-bats and, perhaps more surprisingly, three walks in three games. Two of his four hits were doubles, so he has a delightfully satisfying .400/.500/.600 batting line so far this season. He picked up another two hits last night, and he's giving Willie plenty of excuses to keep Endy Chavez on the bench where he belongs. Regression to the mean is a dirty, dirty whore, but the longer Pagan can keep her waiting in the rain the better off we'll all be.

Nelson Figueroa is here

He might not be here for long, but you can't help but feel good for Nellie. He first popped up on the radar for most people when he was traded to the Phillies in 2000 in the multi-player deal that sent Curt Schilling to the Diamondbacks. He missed all of 2005 following rotator cuff surgery and spent 2006 with Triple-A New Orleans, then a Washington Nationals affiliate. He played 2007 with Los Dorados de Chihuahua of the Mexican League before heading to Taiwan in September of last year to join the Uni-President Lions of the Chinese Professional Baseball League for their playoff run. He won the first game of the first round playoff series before appearing in three games in the championship series -- Games 1, 4 and 7 -- winning them all and being named series MVP. (Source = Wikipedia).

Ryan Church needs a homerun slogan

When Church desposited his two-run bomb into the right-field bleachers in the second inning, I blurted out "Time to go to Church!" without even really thinking. Kim looked at me like I was from another planet, so I repeated it, "Time to go to Church!", in case she hadn't actually heard me the first time. She had, apparently, but even her indifference towards my impromptu slogan-creating awesomeness wasn't enough to dampen my spirits. I'm not sure if it'll stick, and I'm willing to consider alternatives (leave 'em in the comments!), but until something better comes along, whenever Ryno parks one there'll be at least one guy in Jersey shouting, "Time to go to Church!"